Model Citizen

Insert your own hilarious bonne motte here. I simply can't be arsed.

People find it hard to believe I am a model.  I find it hard to believe as well, especially when I look in the mirror and see the R101 with a beard staring back at me.  But I have done a few modelling photo shoots over the years as Henry.  And today I had another assignation.  And where would this photo shoot be taking place?  Which exotic distant sun kissed shore would my delicate little size 12's be plodding around on?  San Tropez, perchance?  Rio de Janeiro, maybe?  Close, but no cigar folks.  I had to be at Barrington Court near Ilminster by 8am this morning.  Hey, who said showbiz wasn't glamorous?

I was to meet up with local professional photographer Simon Plant.   I arrived just after 8am, and then attempted to find somewhere to get changed.  Most of the Court House was still locked up and alarmed, so I headed for Strode House next door and eventually found myself in the big disabled loo, using that as my luxury dressing room.  Well it was lovely to be out in the sun for the photos.  The early morning sun across the sculpted manicured lawns at Barrington looked lovely, and Simon happily snapped away.  He mostly wanted me to look mean and slightly intimidating.  I've been very good at that lately it seems, and I carried on by scowling merrily at the camera whilst clutching a big stick.  We got a few puzzled looks by passing early morning gardeners, but after only half an hour we were done.  Simon was very pleased with the results and has promised to email me the final proofs when done.  I shall post a load on here when they are done and your comments would be most welcome folks.

I got changed and then bumped into the sainted Matthew Applegate, and then the equally sainted Rachel Brewer.  I hadn't seen Rachel since the Mistletoe Fayre last year, so it was great to catch up.  And still my meetings weren't over - just after this Rachel took me to see Sarah Kennedy, another NT lady, not some ex-BBC Radio 2 lush.  I hadn't seen Sarah for ages either so it was nice to see so many old friends.  I stopped off at Ilminster on the way home for a cup of tea at Bilby's and a natter with Tris Pinkney.  After all of this I got home and it was still only just 11am.  What a day!

The afternoon was bound to be a let down and was.  The highlight of the afternoon was a visit to my Doctor who took my blood pressure again, grunted at me and invited me back for more excitement in the same vein in 30 days time.  I can hardly wait.

I am back at Barrington Court on Sunday for a Henry walkabout, and will be accompanied by Emma and Darren from Tudor Roses for their debut at the Court house.  I hope the weather holds up for us.  And now back to sitting on the sofa by myself and sighing.  What a wild way to spend a Friday evening!

Manor Court Junior, Chard

Good King Hal, proving once and for all that he needs the dough. (Geddit?)

My annual visit to Manor Court Junior School in Chard is becoming almost as much of a regular thing as the return of the Swallows every summer. With the slight difference that I don't perch on telephone wires or make small houses out of mud, crap and spit and then stick them in the eaves of people's houses only showing myself to come out and hunt for small airborne insects or to have a poo. And mores the pity I say. How exciting life would be!

I love Manor Court as it is such a friendly school. The teachers are just lovely, always friendly, chatty and great fun. We had the added pleasure of a couple of student teachers today who were all of the above and with the added bonus of both being very easy on the eye. Always a plus point with naughty old Henry. The children were all brilliant today as well - terrific fun, easy to handle and very willing to laugh and have a joke. The morning went swimmingly and soon I was heading into town to grab a sandwich. In previous years I had gone to either Somerfield or Bilby's Sandwich bar, but now in 2009 they are both gone. Bilby's went some time ago and is now a Lloyd's Pharmacy. Somerfield has gone and is being replaced by a Sainsburys, but that won't open until October. Therefore I had to trundle into the middle of town until I found a bakers. I bought a "steak Cornish pasty". For "steak" read "tons of chopped potato and about three bits of apparently carbonised meat gristle in a dull brown sludge". Yummy!

After my gastric blow out at lunch it was back for an afternoon of fun, frolics and jousting. A wonderful time was had by all and a brilliantly mad, eccentric ladies team waltzed off with the title and the certificates. Wonderful stuff. This makes our score for this year:

GENTLEMEN 0 - 2 LADIES

Exciting or what? (What?)

Tomorrow (Friday) I am off to Penrith and my old mate Andy Blundell's place to help him celebrate the opening of his new antique furniture showroom. And then onto Disneyland. Good 'ere, innit?

The BBC Somerset Panel Strikes Again

I almost forgot about this one! Luckily I had a phone call on Friday from Liam O'Leary at the Taunton BBC Office to remind me I was due to appear on Jo Phillips' "Morning Jo" show on BBC Somerset today. Without that I have a nasty feeling this appearance on the show might have slipped my mind altogether.

I drove into Taunton early, but as ever, when you expect bad traffic in Taunton none appears. So I was first of the panel to arrive at the studio today. I was as ever warmly greeted by Emma who had just got back from her holiday in Cornwall.

The other two panel members arrived and, after choosing our stories from the morning papers we were soon ushered into the presence of the delightful Jo Phillips. She looks really good at the moment, her new hairstyle really suits her! My other two panel members were Sue from Southwood and Tracy from Chard. Sue works for the St Margaret's Hospice and Tracy is an author who writes books about recycling and green issues. It was an interesting lively debate and with lots of laughs, particularly at the end. I also got asked to choose the music as the "Panelists Choice" - so, in a show of loyalty that would no doubt have brought a tear to the eye of both Andy Partridge AND Colin Moulding, I chose an XTC track. Namely the wonderful "Stupidly Happy" from the "Wasp Star" album - my son James' favourite song! It was nice to drive away from Taunton with the song being played on the radio - first time I have ever heard it played that way!

I stopped at Ilminster and bought some broom handles to be used as props for my WWII shows, plus I also picked up a flat cap for the character as well from the wonderful Dyers store. I had a quick drink in at Bilby's and said hello to Tris.

I am heading back to Essex on Wednesday and will be appearing at Taversham in Norfolk on Thursday.

Milton Park, Weston-Super-Mare

Gosh, I am tired tonight. Why is it I always forget how long it takes to get to Weston-Super-Mare from here? It takes about an hour and I was also breaking in a new sat nav today. Yes, poor old Doris is no more. I have been running the poor old thing on batteries since her power supply broke a while ago - you may recall me talking about it when I was visiting Blundells in Tiverton. Well, yesterday I purchased a new Doris. Doris II you might say, and today was her baptism of fire and it was a less than auspicious start. I know how to get to the M5 from here, but Doris II seemed hell bent on getting me to the A303 for some reason, completely the wrong direction. Anyway, she pulled through in the end and we made it to Milton Park Primary.

It was a great warm welcome I received from the staff and teachers, and it was a lovely warm day as well, so what more could we ask for. The school was great fun, about 60 children, all very excited and enthusiastic, and the morning seemed shoot past at great speed. I was invited to appear at this school by one of the teachers who had appeared with me on one of the panels I been on when appearing at BBC Somerset's "Morning Jo Show" a while back. It really was a fun day - lots of laughs and some great joining in with the children. After a fine lunch it was all back in the hall again for the afternoon stocks and the jousting tournament. After the preliminaries, the final was a raucous affair with the ladies finally winning through in great style. So this brings our current year totals to stand at:

GENTLEMEN 3 - 2 LADIES

So it is all back in the melting pot again! Doris II got me home safe and sound via Ilminster where I popped into Bilby's for a cuppa, and I have spent a fruitless evening trying to find some glimpses of Manchester City playing in the UEFA Cup on TV. They had virtually every other game on this evening, even Motherwell in France, but not City. And what is more galling? We actually won! What a nice day.

Ilminster Festival and Much Much More!

I know I haven't blogged in a while but I have mitigating circumstances which involve idiocy and Tesco's Broadband, but any more than that my lips are sealed just in case they sue me.

Let me take you back to last Thursday and a getting up at the crack of dawn day. I was off down to Truro Prep School in Cornwall again for a second visit in two years. It is a longish drive but very much worth it. A total delight this school. Fabulous teachers and brilliant kids, and would you believe absolutely everyone dressed to the nines in their Tudor costumes! We even had a fine Hog Roast on the cricket pitch, just as we had two years ago. The weather was gorgeous all day as well which made the trip that much more pleasant.

Friday found me back on BBC Somerset with the gorgeous Jo Phillips on the "Morning Jo Show" broadcasting "live" from Ilminster in preparation for the Ilminster Festival. It was a really fun show to do and seemed to go very well. Please listen again at www.bbc.co.uk/somerset and click on "listen again" and choose the "Morning Jo Show" and "Friday" button! In the evening I was leading the parade for the medieval pageant for the Ilminster Festival itself. We had, apart from me, a fabulous jester called "Jester Trick", loads of kids dressed as fabulous Tudors, a group of men at arms and ladies in waiting from a re-enactment group based in Ilminster, some Morris Men (and women!), a mummers play group and even some Medieval Musicians from the "Daughters of Elvin" group. The parade was great fun, running from the end of Silver Street down to the Market Square where a large stage had been set up, pausing only at The Dolphin Pub so I could have a pint and watch the Morris Men dance, and then briefly outside Bilby's where I "Knighted" Tris Pinkney! Great fun. On the stage I was MC and had great fun bantering with the audience before introducing in turn the Jester, the Mummers, the Musicians and the Jester again, before we were finished just about 9pm. After getting changed I headed to Barrington Court for Matthew Applegate's surprise farewell party for his assistant Simon who was finishing his years placement at the court. Good fun.

Saturday and Sunday I was at Barrington Court doing walkabouts. Saturday was relatively quiet, about 500 people in, but Sunday was packed as there was a Jazz Band on for a Father's Day special. I guess we had about 1,500 through the door. Wonderful! Lots of lovely people to meet and good fun had by all. The weekend finished with me and Matthew Applegate sinking a pint or two at the Duke of York pub in my beloved Shepton Beauchamp.

Today I have driven up to Essex and over the next few days I will be appearing at Thundersley in Southend, Kingsclere in Berkshire and Broadstairs in Kent. Should be fun. And you never know, Tesco Broadband might lose some idiocy and get me re-connected! Hoorah!

BBC Somerset Bus

Another week and another appearance on Jo Phillips' "Morning Jo Show" panel on BBC Somerset. There were a couple of differences though. Firstly we weren't in the studio in Taunton but on the BBC Broadcast Bus in Market Street in Crewkerne. And secondly, there was no Emma Britton as she is away on holiday and her place was taken by Liam, the bus driver and he did a very passable impression. I was on the show with a couple of ladies, one from Crewkerne Town Council and another lady from Drimpton just up the road from Clapton. It is quite a snug fit inside the studio on the bus, but it was good fun, especially the chat about cows! You will know what I mean if you listen again on line!

After the show I wandered to the bank and then back to Bilby's for a cup of tea where I bumped into Annette, the lady from the Town Council again and we had a nice chat and she invited me to come to Crewkerne in November and turn on the Christmas lights as Henry! I accepted on the spot! Watch this space...

Tomorrow I am back at Blandford Camp in Dorset and it should be a good 'un!

Happy Birthday To Me - and Half Term

Just a quick note to explain the long silence on this blog! It's been half term and so the King has been taking it easy! My wife, son and I had a few days down in South Wales staying with my sister near Cynwyl Elfed just outside Carmarthen, including some fun runabouts on the beach with James down at Llansteffan, and James and I went and had a nice lunch one day down at Bilby's in Ilminster, where James flirted outrageously with a young blonde waitress and even gave her a Love Heart (it's a sweet folks, don't worry). Not bad for a five year old!

I am continuing to work on the End of Winter Party which is coming up at the end of March and I am currently having two of my Henry costumes renovated. I am next on parade as everyone's favourite monarch (apart from Terry Deary) on Friday 29th February for another return visit to Trull near Taunton. Watch this space for a full report.

BBC Somerset - The News Panel

Today I had been invited back on to the Morning Jo Show on BBC Somerset and another appearance on the Morning News Panel. I drove into Taunton quite early and arrived in time to begin sifting through the papers prior to going on air. I found a great story about Berwick-upon-Tweed wanting to be back in Scotland again, so I chose that mainly so I could retell my own experiences of visiting this funny little town. I was joined on the panel by two sisters, Hayley and Carly, one a beautician and the other a cabin crew member for Virgin Atlantic. Both stunners, and nice company as well.

Jo Phillips was a great presenter as usual and Emma Britton a superb assistant and travel news updater. We all had some good laughs and it seemed to go particularly well today. If you would like to hear how it went, please go to the www.bbc.co.uk/somerset website and click on "Listen Again" and choose the Morning Jo Show for Wednesday!

I stopped off in Ilminster on the way back and bought a couple of books, then had some lunch in Bilby's and chatted to Tris. This afternoon I did a load of paperwork in the office and made some phone calls. I also received a couple of lovely emails from ladies at the schools in Shoeburyness and Sheppey saying how much everyone had enjoyed the Henry days - which was most gratifying. I shall have to see if we can add those to the "Feedback" pages on the website. Go and see if I have done it yet! www.goodkinghal.co.uk

St Paul's Junior School, Shepton Mallet

A brand new school for me today! I drove up to Shepton Mallet this morning for a visit to St Paul's C of E Junior School, less than a week after my last visit to the town to have surgery! This was a far less stressful visit than last time - in fact it was a total delight from start to finish. The school itself is a remarkable old building and winds it's way around like a sort of demented rabbit warren. I arrived just about 8am and went to front door reception and rang the bell. No reply. I tried again. Still no reply. I gave up and went back to the car. Five minutes later I tried again. Still no reply! I finally tried the door, just in case it was open anyway, but it wasn't. I was about to give up again when the door suddenly opened and I was greeted by a man with a slightly surprised expression on his face.

"Can I help?" He asked. I held my hand out towards him.

"Henry the VIIIth" I announced. He looked blankly at me.

"Pardon?" Oh dear. Perhaps I was at the wrong address.

"Henry the VIIIth? Here for the Tudor day?" His face suddenly broke into a smile.

"Oh I see. Sorry, I thought you were a nutter." He was probably right!

The day itself was wonderful. Some of the loveliest, liveliest children you could ever hope to meet. The teachers and TA's were uniformly kind and pleasant, and the whole day was just wonderful.

I had lunch with some of the kids in the dining hall, which was entertaining to say the least. The afternoon session was a belter if a little rushed at the end as I ran out of time! However, the boys romped to a famous victory in the jousting.

After re-loading the car I was on my way home, pausing in Crewkerne to visit the bank, and then pop in to Bilby's a finally managed to track down Tris to see if he might be interested in taking part in the Tudor weekend at Sudeley Castle next May. He seems keen at the moment, mostly because it was where Liz Hurley got married! I think he has a little something for her.

Milverton Junior School, Somerset

It was a delightful return to Milverton Junior School near Wellington in Somerset today. It is something like 3 years since my previous visit. I kept occasionally bumping into pupils and teachers from this school during my appearances at Somerset County Museum in Taunton over the years, but here I was again!

I arrived very early this morning and it all came back to me! I remembered the layout of the school quite quickly and it was good to see some familiar faces from all those years ago! The children were just brilliant today. They laughed a lot and had a tremendous knowledge of Tudor times. The teachers were so friendly and chatty, it was like I had only been there three weeks ago, not three years!

I drove into the middle of the delightful village of Milverton for my lunch, getting some nice sandwiches from the shop in the middle. Milverton is so beautiful, a real sleeping beauty of a place.

The afternoon was brilliant, so much laughter and fun with the children and a rip roaring joust which, completely against my prediction, was won by the gentlemen! I pottered home, pausing only in Ilminster to see if I could catch up with Tris from Bilby's, but he was over at the Crewkerne branch. And so here I am at home, waiting for the England v Croatia match to kick off tonight...