Roman Hill Middle School, Lowestoft

Mike Farley as Good King Hal, and Helen Budd, Assistant Events Manager at Leeds Castle, working their socks off at the recent Royal Jousting Tournament.  BTW, Irn Bru tastes like crap.

I love this picture on the right.  Darlene from Leeds Castle sent it to me the other day and it just makes me laugh so much.  It almost looks like dear little Helen Budd is resting her feet on my head!

Today was yet another return visit to Roman Hill Middle School in Lowestoft in north Suffolk.  Thankfully my journey up was painless compared to a couple of years back (see this blog passim) and there were no major road traffic accidents or horrendous roadworks in Lowestoft itself.  In fact the only two things that ruined the journey up was the fact I had to leave at just before 6am and most of the journey was spent listening to the inane brainless ramblings of Sarah Kennedy on Radio 2.  Considering it is only a couple of days after the Air France plane crash, the idiotic woman was jabbering about her own experiences of Air France on a recent trip to Egypt.  Apparently it was a "jolly nice airline", which I am sure will be of monumental relief to all the mourning families across the globe.   And as today was a polling day in the European elections, she assured us she would not be digging any political stories out of the newspaper reviews that she does each day.  Now Sarah has her political colours very firmly nailed to her mast most of the time and you would have to be pretty dense not to work out her political leanings, but she was not going to make any comments about the impending implosion of Gordon Brown's government in the elections - but she reckoned the day was going to be entertaining and "jolly interesting".  Someone get this buffoon off the air because....damn!  But enough of my Will Smith impressions from "Men in Black".

It was great fun at the school today.  A group of about 80, very enthusiastic children, and some lovely teachers - but not dear Rebecca Haste from previous years.  She was busy having a fun time in Australia, and I can't blame her!  She'd heard my inane jokes for the previous five years and probably considered the antipodes as the best place to get away from them this time around.  We had a fabulous day with the only draw back being we ran out of time to find champions in the jousting!  We had a ladies race and a gents race, but that was it!  No final!  Perhaps next year.  The journey back was less of a drag as Sarah Kennedy had gone home to nail four CWT of blue bunting to the front of her country mansion.

I have spent this evening trying to teach James how to play "Super Mario Cart" on the Wii, and he is slowly getting the hang of it, but he is still not quite getting the idea that driving in a straight line is the quickest way to win a race.  Never mind, I am sure even Lewis Hamilton and Jensen Button had these problems at first.  Tomorrow I am back at Northwick Park in Canvey Island.  Should be a good one.

Martham and Lowestoft

It was a return visit to two schools in East Anglia this week, but only one had kept it's name the same since my previous appearance! For the past two years I had ventured to Martham village and appeared at West Flegg Middle School. But recently Norfolk County Council have decided to do away with the three tiered education system and first, middle and high schools are becoming a thing of the past. West Flegg Middle had now metamorphed into Martham Primary School! It was good to see Judy Colman there again as she is a lovely lady and was as welcoming and friendly as on previous visits. It was a very big group on the Wednesday with something in the region of about 140 children, but they were brilliantly well behaved and we had a great day. With such big groups, even the little carousel activities were well attended and lively! After a fine lunch of pasta it was into the afternoon with added gusto and a rip roaring jousting tournament which the ladies sneaked home on to win! The following day after my visit they were having the official opening ceremony of the new school and they were all desperate to rehearse their show, so as soon as Tudor day finished I was out the hall so that they could begin their preparations. I stayed my two nights in East Anglia down at my parents in Essex, so I had quite a drive down from Martham to Mountnessing.

Thursday saw my fourth annual visit to Lowestoft and the very wonderful Roman Hill Middle School. As I drove up my fuel guage in the car was getting lower and lower, but as I was making such good progress I decided to press on and wait until I was virtually in Lowestoft before stopping to refuel. Great idea in principle, but unfortunately I had left my wallet and all my money on the side in my parent's kitchen in Essex. DOH! So as soon as I arrived at the school and was greeted by the delightful Rebecca Haste I had to fall upon her mercies and ask for a load of £20 so I could actually get back to my parents and my dear wallet! Rebecca is just such a lovely lady, so friendly, helpful and easy to get along with. She makes visiting her school a total pleasure. We had a great day as usual at Roman Hill, lots of laughs, another big group and some fantastic costumes. For once the gents triumphed in the jousting and when all was done and dusted we all posed for some photos for the local paper and I was soon on my way, but as I said only thanks to Rebecca's generosity! I can't wait to come back and visit Roman Hill again.

I stopped back at my parents for dinner and then at about 7.30pm began the long plod back to Somerset, but it was a nice easy drive and I listened to the thrilling climax to the Scottish Premier League with the Celtic and Rangers matches being broadcast on Radio 5. They were exciting matches that kept me on the edge of my seat, which was very lucky as I was so tired after two very early starts and lots of driving. I stopped briefly for petrol on the return and was served by a man who was so icey and bad tempered as to make Sue English seem like a over-prozac'd game show host. Smashing.

Home for a loud welcome from the cat who was so delighted to see me and we ended up cuddled up on the sofa with her purring loudly in my ear. Very nice. I have a day of sort of leisure today and tomorrow I am back up at Sudeley Castle in Gloucestershire for their grand Tudor weekend. I would hope to see lots of familiar faces back there! That includes you...