Something Old, Something New....

Good King Hal, taking part in one of his favourite pass-times - international pro-celebrity wench hugging. He is now up to Olympic standard and is rapidly going blind.

And so it was to be back on the road again, two visits coming up, one in Essex and one in Hertfordshire. My first trip was on the Wednesday with a return visit to Tolleshunt D'arcy, the wonderfully named village near Maldon in Essex. I hadn't visited this school (St Nicholas') for a couple of years, but it was nice to be back. The trip to the school was entertaining, but not in a very nice way. My sat nav, halfway out of Basildon (where I was staying) suddenly decided to just freeze up completely. I tried turning it on and off but all to no avail, it would not pick up the route I needed. In the end I had to remove the data chip and put it back in making the whole system re-boot. But it seemed to work, the sat nav picked up the route again, only to then lose it again. And again, and again. Over and over it kept losing the satellites. It was a wonder I made it to the school at all! But I did. It was nice to see the teachers I had worked with before, including the glamorous TA who was a dead spit for the gorgeous Linda Lusardi! It was a small year three group, which was hard work occasionally, but most of the time they were a good, lively group and seemed to thoroughly enjoy their day with the King. The jousting was a lively affair and finally culminated in a long overdue victory for the Gentlemen! This made the score:

GENTLEMEN 10 - 13 LADIES

I left, and then encountered more problems with the ****ing sat nav. My predicament was not helped by the A414 down to Danbury and the A12 (my route home) was shut for no adequately explained reason. With the sat nav badly mis-firing I had to find my own way home. I eventually drove out back to the A12 via Hatfield Peverell. I was very glad to be home. That evening my wife and I took James (my lovely son) off to his karate lesson - this was only his second lesson, but he seemed to really enjoy himself. They certainly keep them moving there and by the time we got him home he was cream crackered!

The following morning I was up very early for a drive up to Ware in Hertfordshire for a visit to St Mary's Junior School. I was not sure how well my sat nav would behave so I took along a spare unit, quite an elderly one, that my wife has acquired as a sort of "belt and braces" approach. Typically, just when you thought it would be a day of frequently re-booting my sat nav, it worked perfectly. I got to the school very early, so decided to go off and find some petrol so I wouldn't have to stop on the way home. Apparently, they have never heard of petrol stations in Ware. I drove round and round and round, and eventually was forced to use the naughty sat nav and ended up driving nearly half way to Hertford before I found one. Mind you, it turned out to be worth it as the very attractive young lady who served me also turned out to be gobsmackingly dim as well, as she only charged me for my petrol and not the sandwich and drink I had bought for breakfast. The actual Tudor Day itself at St Mary's was a delight. This is a lovely school - great kids, lovely teachers and a warm friendly atmosphere throughout. It was a memorable first visit and a delight from start to finish. The jousting was a rollicking affair with so much noise. But a seemingly small and unsure ladies team stormed through to a remarkable victory! This now brings the latest score as:

GENTLEMEN 10 - 14 LADIES

I have a couple of days with my lovely son in Essex now, before heading back to Somerset this weekend. My next Henry appearance will be at Redstart Primary in Chard on Tuesday. I am looking forward to it! Oh, and there is talk of a Hoop Cricket Club reunion sometime soon - watch this space.

Press Release!

This is a press release going out today to various TV stations, radio stations and newspapers advertising the upcoming new Henry VIII Days at Barrington Court in Somerset.

An Exciting New Project at Barrington Court

Barrington Court, near Ilminster in Somerset, was the first house acquired by the National Trust back in 1907. Fully restored to its Tudor glory, the house has been delighting thousands of visitors a year ever since, with its fine architecture, beautiful rustic setting and delightful Gertrude Jekyll-inspired gardens. But now in 2010 comes a brand new exciting venture for this most venerable of old buildings.

Mike Farley is the UK’s number one professional Henry VIII look-a-like and re-enactor. He has been delighting audiences around the country for over six years now with his brilliant interpretation of our most infamous of monarchs. With his booming voice, wicked humour and uncanny resemblance to the King, he is in great demand at country houses, museums, and castles, and with radio and TV companies throughout the land. Mike’s specialist Tudor Days in junior schools throughout the country are enormously popular and he has brought Henry to life in almost 700 schools and to countless delighted pupils. Now Mike and his company, Past Presence Ltd, are combining with the National Trust and Barrington Court to bring his full Tudor Day to life in this most magnificent of settings. Schools can now come and experience a full on Tudor Day with Henry VIII in the sumptuous surroundings of Barrington Court.

The first of these exciting days takes place on Wednesday, June 30th 2010 when the junior pupils and their teachers from Barrington, Shepton Beauchamp and Ilton Schools step back in time and meet the King in person! And the National Trust and Past Presence Ltd would like you to be there as well, to share this exciting moment with your viewers, readers and listeners, and to see a whole new chapter beginning in the long history of Barrington Court! A story with everything, local interest, history, humour and a really quirky angle!

For more information either call Mike Farley from Past Presence Ltd on 01460 271623 or speak to Matthew Applegate, the Visitor Services Manager at Barrington Court on 01460 243124.

Harlow, Goodbye

Good King Hal, suddenly discovering that woodworm can "jump" from stocks to cod-piece in one easy movement.

OK, so on last Wednesday evening, I am in Langport, at LouLou's bar helping out some friends on a pub quiz, which I am delighted to announce that we win. I get home just after 11pm. On Thursday morning I am up at 3am and driving to Essex by 3.30am. Just after 9am I am in Brentwood Community Hospital where my 7-year-old son is being observed and tested about his learning delay. By 11am we are informed that he has autism. For me this is quite a relief as the worst part about any problems with a child of your own is the not knowing what is going on. To finally be able to put a label on it is, I feel, the first positive step in doing something about it and I feel now that this is known he will get all the help and support he needs, as well as his usual quota of love and affection from his Mother and myself. My wife seems to have taken it a lot more on the chin than me, and seemed deeply shell shocked for the rest of the day, but I think she is slowly getting a lid on it.

On the Friday I was up to Harlow and a return visit to that delightful school, Little Parndon. This was, I think, my fifth annual visit and the school just seems to get better and better. As usual, there were some fabulous costumes, lovely kids, excitable ones as well, fantastic teachers and a warm welcome. We had a really good day all in all, for me the only down part being having to take all my props out the car during what can only be described as a monsoon. I was literally soaked to the skin when I had finished. The jousting was very exciting and, sensation of all sensations, led to another win for the gentlemen! What is happening? This now makes the annual score:

GENTLEMEN 15 - 23 LADIES

Glad to see them making a fight of it.

A nice weekend has been had with lots of fun with my son, particularly the way he took over the meal when we took him to Pizza Hut on Saturday. As we walked in the front door he walked up to a waitress and said "table for three, please!" And then later in the meal he all but put his hand up and snapped his fingers for her attention when he wanted a refill of his drink.

Tomorrow (Monday) I am back to another favourite school of mine - Wickford Junior in...er...Wickford. Back to Somerset tomorrow night.

Coalway Junior, Coleford and Many Happy Returns!

Good King Hal about to get his robes caught in a piece of fearsome looking farm machinery. (left)

The alarm went off at 5am. Not again! It would have been very, very easy just to turn it off and slip back into the arms of sleep - I had to really make myself get up on Thursday morning. The drive up to Coleford in the Forest of Dean is nearly always a pleasurable one as you travel through some wonderful countryside once you have escaped from the M5. I have been visiting Coalway Junior for the past five years, and Thursday it was my sixth visit to this wonderful place. It is almost like returning to a family with each visit as there are so many friendly welcoming faces. You have not in your entire life heard such a loud, funny, laughter filled staff room! And the children are pretty cool too. We had a lovely day, with plenty of laughs in the morning and the children really displaying a fine level of Tudor knowledge. Some of their designs for their coats of arms were staggeringly good!

After a nice tuna baguette and salad at lunchtime it was back into the main hall for more of the same silliness. Despite frequent interruptions from children going into the canteen for music lessons on a loud piano, everything went swimmingly. The jousting tournament was again of a quite brilliantly high standard. Two fine teams went head to head in the final, and after a poor start the gents pulled themselves into a slight lead, only for them to be reigned in by a quite fabulous ladies team who stormed to victory. Wonderful stuff. This now makes the score:

GENTLEMEN 12 - 18 LADIES

The ladies are starting to pull away again now. Come on Gents!

At home I treated myself to a venison steak for dinner, which was delicious. So what was the cause of this gluttonous levity? Well, today is February 26th and is my 43rd birthday! So I am celebrating this morning with a banana and strawberry smoothie, and I am now expanding my mind by watching The Jeremy Kyle Show. I know how to enjoy myself! Dinner tomorrow night with a load of friends and family to look forward to, at the Duke of York pub in Shepton Beauchamp. Lovely!

Cobbaton Combat Museum, Devon

Here we see Matthew Applegate, Visitors Services Manager at Barrington Court, showing utter disdain for Hitler and his entire war machine, by posing in front of a Sherman Tank a good 60 years after the war finished.

It was our "lads day out"! Matthew and I had been planning for a few weeks for a trip to Cobbaton Combat Museum, a privately owned collection of militaria in the Devon countryside, so we could enjoy looking at the tanks, but also so we could have a look at their prices when it came to de-activated weapons and uniforms (all for research into my forthcoming WWII Home Guard shows). I picked up Matthew from Barrington Court at about 11am and we drove down the M5 and turned off at the Tiverton exit. We fairly quickly found the museum, but it was more than definitely lunch by this time and as I had done the driving and paid for the fuel, Matthew offered to buy lunch. I refused his offer of a Pot Noodle and a glass of water and instead we began a hunt for a pub, and what a pub did we find! We drove to the village of Chittlehampton and went into the Bell Inn. If you are down in this area of Devon I can highly recommend it - great food and fabulous beer. I would have been quite happy to stay there all day, but it was time to head back to Cobbaton and the museum.

It was an interesting stroll round the exhibits and they have some marvellous stuff there, but by God do they need a Museum Manager. Most of the exhibits are caked in dust, and we are talking YEARS-WORTH rather than just weeks. Quite a few of the photo exhibits are water or condensation damaged and a major portion of the entire exhibition seems to be cobwebs. Most of the tanks and people carriers seem to be used as storage cupboards as well as exhibits. You also find large swathes of exhibits with absolutely no information on them at all - you just have to guess. Despite me sounding very negative, please understand this museum is well worth a visit - but it could be so much better.

Back to Somerset we tried to stop for a pint somewhere but were just a bit too early for anywhere to be open yet, so it was back to Matthew's flat in Strode House and a cup of tea. Very nice, but a pint would have been better!

This weekend it is up to Essex for an appearance as Henry at Southminster Museum in Southend. See you there.

Wandsworth and Bishop's Stortford

I always know when it is time for me to visit Finton House School in Wandsworth. There are always certain hints and clues that it is that time of year again. Firstly, it is Wimbledon Fortnight, and secondly, on the drive to the school you will always hear the words on the radio weather forecast "today is likely to be the hottest day of the year so far!" And it happened again this year! With temperatures on Tuesday rocketing to the upper 20's I knew I was going to be in for a hard time of it in the robes, so I reduced my overheating chances by not wearing my Henry "bodice" today and went for the plain shirt and pantaloons look. Much more agreeable. It was a small group as ever at Finton House, but a nice one. About 25 children, all girls bar one lad! Very strange. They were a remarkably quiet group during the morning, but perked up a bit by lunchtime, and the afternoon was a real hoot with some great moments, particularly in the jousting when, unsurprisingly with their huge advantage in numbers, a team of just ladies won. The drive out of Wandsworth and over to my parents in Essex was enough to make you want to chew your own foot off. It was slow, hot, bad tempered and chock full of cars wherever I went. But at last I made it. For a large part of the journey the temperature sensor on the outside of my trust Peugeot reckoned it was 35 degrees outside and I could almost believe it.

Today found me making a first appearance at a new school. I was off to Hillmead Junior in Bishop's Stortford, a really nice school with some genuinely lovely teachers there who were very friendly, especially the charming South African lady who looked after the reception class children. Again it was a small group of about 25, but a much more diverse mix and we had a really lovely day. Lots of laughs and fun and some of the children showing some quite brilliant knowledge of the Tudors. One young lady got a perfect score on my Tudor quiz, not something that happens very often. Well done to her!

After a rip roaring jousting session I was on my way and the journey home was slightly less fraught than the long march back from Wandsworth the day before, despite the A414 being gridlocked in one place.

Had dinner with my parents and my wife and son - lovely fish and chips from the good Fish'n Chick'n Bar in Rayleigh Road, Hutton. And then after watching Andy Murray being steam rollered into submission by Rafal Nadal I was on my way and back home. Ah! Bed!

Enmore Primary

Back in January 2006 I visited Enmore Primary. I had been requested for this return visit and, wrack my brain all I could, I just could not picture the school at all. Not a jot! I could not remember the village, or anything about the place at all. And then I arrived at the car park, and it all flooded back to me! It was then (in 2006) and is now (2008) a fantastic school. I was working with a mixed class of 28 pupils of years four and five. It was also a different form teacher this time around, a charming fairly newly qualified lady by the name of Laura Potter who was bedecked in a most becoming red Tudor dress that she'd had made by dressmakers in Bahrain (where her parents live and where she was brought up)!

The class were fantastic today, all dressed in wonderful Tudor costumes and showing some fabulous knowledge. After my opening talk and a lot of laughs I kept the relatively small group all together for the activities. With the quiz we had two perfect scores from a couple of the ladies and some of the coat of arms designs they came up with were brilliant. Miss Potter suggested that they would make a collage of the designs on the walls of their classroom.

After lunch (which I had to drive virtually into Bridgwater to get from a petrol station! Mmm! Cold sandwiches!) it was back for more Tudor mayhem in the hall. The afternoon really zipped by and we had a cracking jousting tournament culminating in yet another triumph for the ladies. I reassured the disappointed boys team that this sort of thing happens all the time...

Back home I was due to visit my landlord and his partner's place this evening for dinner with them, but unfortunately he wasn't feeling very well and so the meal was postponed. I am back on duty as Henry again on Monday morning at Blundell's Prep School in Tiverton in Devon for a third visit in as many years.

BBC Somerset Panel Again

I had managed to wangle my way back on to the Panel on the BBC Somerset's "Morning Jo" Radio programme today. It was to publicise this coming weekend's "Right Royal Weekend" at Barrington Court. The morning traffic was virtually non-existant for once and so I was a bit early when I arrived at the august portals of BBC Somerset in Park Street, Taunton. I was greeted by the ever lovely Emma Britton and taken up to the waiting area where I could begin sifting through the days newspapers.

I was joined on the panel today by Simon Lomax, a musician and teacher from Somerton and the charming Maggie Mickshik from the Martha Care charity for sick children based in Glastonbury. Jo Phillips was, as ever, a brilliant host and a lovely lady (as the photo here shows!) and the conversation flowed so easily today. If you missed the show and would like to hear it again then go to www.bbc.co.uk/somerset and click on the "Listen Again" tab and choose the "Morning Jo Show" for Friday. I chose as my story from the paper today the horrific news that the new England cricket kit will be without a chunky cable knit sweater. This is the end of an era and enough to make grown men want to throw themselves from the top of Old Father Time at Lord's Cricket Ground. Half the fun of playing cricket is wearing the big baggy sweater that manages to make even the most attractive and dashing of men appear to be Worzel Gummidge's younger brother who has lost interest in scaring crows and has really let himself go.

Right, off to the Doctor's shortly to see if I can get my deaf ear sorted out. Tomorrow and Sunday I am at a waterlogged Barrington Court (if the weather forecast is anything to go by). I shall wear my water proof codpiece.

Real People Magazine - It's true you know!

Just to let all of you fine people out there that Real People Magazine, featuring yours truly is out NOW! And remember it is only a weekly, so you only have until next Wednesday to get a copy. So what are you doing here reading this blog? Get out there and buy it now. HURRY!