Medstead Primary, Hampshire

It was a nasty shock for me first thing this morning... I had set my alarm to go off at 5.30am for the long drive to Hampshire and my visit to Medstead Primary School. My sat nav had indicated it would take me about two hours to get there and I like to be at a school as soon after 8am as I can possibly manage. Therefore my shock was complete when my wife woke me at nearly 6.30am and asked me what time I was getting up. 6.30? ARGH! I wanted to be out of the house by 6.15am! Somehow I managed to get showered, shaved and everything else in about 10 minutes flat and was on my way! I shot through the traffic and managed to arrive at the school at about 8.30am. It was lovely to see Helen Poore again - she had booked me about two years ago at a school in Long Sutton in Hampshire, and now she was working at Medstead she decided to inflict me on these children.

We had a superb day. We began in one of the classrooms with everyone in together. After an extended break for a morning assembly the morning continued apace. The children were bright and sparky and showed the usual high knowledge of all things Tudor related. We had a couple of young deaf lads in and I shared the stage with their signer, whilst I also wore a booster mic for one of them who had a cochlear implant.

After a fine lunch of Toad NOT in the hole (the sausages and the batter pudding were served seperately!) it was back in the hall for hanging drawing and quartering, a belt round with the stocks, and then a rip roaring joust which, getting back to the usual routine, the ladies won! The final stages of the joust were enhanced by some of the parents for the group turning up. I was therefore photographed more times than I care to mention!

Tomorrow, I am off to Tiverton in Devon for a return visit to what used to be called St Aubyns, but is now known as Blundell's Preparatory School.

West Pennard - the second!

There are some Henry days I look back on and think "to be honest, it could have gone better" and then there are days like today. It was damn near perfect! A fabulous school, which I was returning to in it's delightful surroundings over looking the Somerset levels and Glastonbury Tor! It was going to be nice back with one of my all time favourite teachers to work with, Mr Ian Gouge. Ian is just one of life's really nice people. I know Michael Palin sometimes gets hacked off with constantly being referred to as Mr Nice, but if he ever gets fed up with the title, Ian can take it off him with ease! First thing in the morning Ian told me how good his class were this year, and he was not wrong. I cannot remember the last time I went through a whole Henry day without having to have at least a quiet word in someone's ear about their behaviour. The children were fantastic - they laughed uproariously at all the jokes, had a splendid level of general Tudor knowledge and were polite, friendly and easy to talk to. It just made my life so simple! As it was only a class of about 27 I rested the whole "carousel" of activities and just sat in on them one by one, starting with the Tudor quiz on the boards. After break the children got stuck into designing their own coat of arms, and as usual we had some fabulous designs with the usual very high Doctor Who content!

After a nice fish and chips lunch, it was into the main hall for the final fling! The stocks were a riot of laughs and lots of fun. The jousting was a fine contest, the much faster but less disciplined boys team just losing out to a good ladies team. I was trapped in the school playground for a while - my car being blocked in by a school bus, but as soon as that was gone I was on my way.

I would like to say a big thank you to Mr Ian Gouge and Year 5 at the school for making a genuinely pleasurable day so memorable!

A nice weekend at leisure coming up, probably spent getting wet judging by the weather forecast! Monday I am down to Hampshire for another Henry bash...

Done it. It's in. It will never leave again...

The sofa is in. How we did it, I don't really know. It has been outside all day in the pouring rain under a temporary lash up to stop too much water spilling on to it. Our friend Ian Thomas from Kingstone came over in his van to help out. He was so confident that the sofa would be in our house within a few minutes that he actually left the engine running on his van. Fool!

This move took two heart-attacks, three hernias, four tantrums, a load of scraped paint, a broken door bell, a scuffed painting by my father and a partridge in a pear tree.

How the Polar Bear looks in the picture is how I feel right now. But the sofa is in. It is soaked, so I am now going to have to sit here gently wafting warm air over it from my wife's hair dryer, but it is in. And believe me, if we ever move - it stays here!

Tomorrow - for a rest I am off to West Pennard School near Glastonbury, for a return visit to Ian Gouge and his lovely year 5 class. I can't wait!

Back on the road again.

After an extended break over Easter it was back to normal again yesterday. I was back at Little Parndon School in Harlow in Essex for the third year running. But I am getting ahead of myself, there is a lot more to tell in this story!

Another reason for going to Essex was to pick up a sofa that my parents were donating to us in replacement for our old squashy green sofa which has been well and truly cat and toddler splatted. So on Tuesday 8th I picked up a big transit van from my friends at Popular Motors in Merriott. My lovely wife dropped me over there to pick it up, but she then drove off with the front door keys! I desperately phoned her from the office at Popular Motors and also from a call box later, but she had gone to do a clinic (she is a health visitor) over at Chard and was likely to be unobtainable for a couple of hours. I sat in the van on our front drive and then had a little snooze. After about two hours there was still no sign of my wife. Eventually I realised I had to do something fairly drastic, so I managed to break in through a downstairs window. If you know me then you will be more than aware that I am not exactly ideal cat burglar build, so this was quite a painful and embarrassing action and not one I wish to repeat for a while! Anyway, much later I was on my way back to Essex. I arrived at about 8.30pm and settled in for the evening with a glass of wine and some peanuts and life looked a lot more rosey!

I travelled up to Little Parndon and was delighted to see some familiar faces straight away! This is a lovely school, the teachers are wonderful, friendly and charming and more than happy to help in any way they can. It was a group of about 60+ children and they were great! Very sparky and full of laughs. The afternoon joust was not exactly a classic, as the boys team was so much better than anyone else they simply steam-rollered any opposition.

Back at my parents I now had the joy of trying to get the new sofa into the van. My parents (who were away) suggested I ask one of the neighbours for some help in loading the sofa as it was large and awkward rather than heavy. I knocked on both neighbours doors and got no response! I tried phoning some old friends in Essex, namely Sara Turner and Mick Stephenson, both erstwhile members of The Hoop Cricket Club, but both of them were already well ensconced in a couple of pubs and beyond helping me. In the end I somehow managed to manhandle the unwieldly sofa into the back of the van.

The drive home was long, wet and dark. I was very grateful to be home. In the morning my wife and I took our old sofa outside to make some room for the new one. We then got the new one out of the van - and it won't fit through the door! Amanda had to go to work so I am left here at home with a new sofa in the garden (the old one has gone to the great sofa heaven in the sky - aka the local recycling dump) and no way to get it in the house. HELP!

TO BE CONTINUED............

An Evening Function

It was all back to Essex again for the weekend. I had been booked to appear as Henry at a Ladies Festival Evening for the Epping Forest Masonic Lodge at Furze Hill in Margaretting. It was quite nerve wracking as I was doing the job for some friends of mine. Working just for people who have booked you just because of what you do is hard enough, but when it is friends who have booked you, you know you will have to go the extra mile. I hope they were happy!

It was a lovely, but very warm evening, but my wife looked beautiful in her new dress and with her new hair style and it was a pleasure to dance the night away with her!

We stayed on in Essex until the Monday, enjoying our 7th wedding anniversary on Sunday the 29th April on the way. A lovely time!

I have just picked up some new bookings from new schools in Taunton and Christchurch, and the Somerset County Museum want me to do an "Evening with Henry VIIIth" in July. I shall post more details as and when they become more solid.

Don't Get Too Excited...

Now I have no wish to cause the nation's pulse rate to rocket through the roof, but I have heard today from a very nice lady called Pam that my tender-stem broccoli, won during my triumphant four days on the BBC Radio 2 programme Steve Wright in the Afternoon's Big Quiz, will be arriving next Monday! Or possibly Tuesday! Huzzah! Now this really is the big time! We have already received the cast iron wok to cook it all in. That was a bit of a shock when it arrived - it was huge. It is going to be like trying to cook in Jodrell Bank. Maybe a case of wok and awe? Oh, never mind. Anyway, next week we shall be getting stuck into our tender stem broccoli - and I can't wait! Who says general knowledge doesn't pay? Or is it crime? Who cares.

Back to Essex this weekend for a Masonic evening as Henry. Should be fun.

Undefeated Champnio!

"And so, it came to pass that the right Royal Tudor monarch came to his fourth day as reigning champnio (sic) on Steve Wright in the Afternoon's Big Quiz. And verily, he didst triumph again and did gain more prizes of the tons-of-classic-soul-artistes-CD's variety. And he didst worry if he might cop a question the next day about "Coronation Street" or quantam physics of which he knew-eth precisely nowt, and wouldst lose all his worldly prizes. And there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth, and he didst chicken out and leggeth it with all his prizes and who couldst blameth him?"

Yes, in that rather florid way, I can confirm that I have retired, Rocky Marciano-like, undefeated as Champnio on the "Steve Wright in the Afternoon" "Big Quiz". It has been a really fun four days, and I know I got a big score today but I felt I was living on borrowed time and so yes, I took the cowards way out, and cut and run. I hope you have all had a good listen to me, if you missed it you can go to the Steve Wright page on the BBC Radio 2 website and click listen again!

So, I had now better go back to being a normal monarch again now!

The Royal Progress Continues...

My third day arrives for my appearances on the BBC Radio 2 Show, Steve Wright in the Afternoon. I was still the reigning champnio (sic) on their "The Big Quiz". Today my opponent on line was a very nice sounding chap from Edinburgh who drove a cab for a living and had once had J K Rowling in the back of his taxi!

My questions came thick and fast, and luckily for once I wasn't too thick and quite fast at answering. I managed to rack up a score of 11. The other chap did quite well and managed to get to 7, but basically to cut a long story short I had won again! Champnio AGAIN! My prize today was four tickets to the "Countryside Rocks" concert featuring among others Bryan Ferry, Eric Clapton, Steve Winwood and various other super annuated superstars. I must pack my green wellies.

So I am back tomorrow for more - will the King's reign continue for another day, giving me a grand total of four days and nearly halfway through the entire reign of Lady Jane Grey when she became Queen.

BBC Radio 2 - 88 to 91 FM. The Big Quiz is on at about 3.45pm each weekday. Wish me luck again.

The Wheels Haven't Come Off - Yet!

The most amazing thing happened today... I won on "The Big Quiz" again! For those who didn't read yesterday's entry I am currently the reigning "Champnio" (sic) on BBC Radio 2's Steve Wright in the Afternoon Show's general knowledge quiz. Today I got 12 questions right while my opponent only managed to get 6. My prize for this effort was a cracker! A Scooby Doo Classic DVD, a DVD player, and almost more excitingly for my son, a big hamper of "retro" sweets for us to munch as we sit and watch the Scooby Doo DVD together! Groovy! When asked if I wanted to come back tomorrow, I thought about it for about half a second and said "yes". So please wish me luck and listen in to BBC Radio 2 again tomorrow. By the way, please no more jokes about my year's supply of broccoli that I won yesterday, otherwise I shall invite you to dinner and force feed you broccoli.

And the winner is...

So, I have now been on Steve Wright in the Afternoon, and the "Big Quiz". Last week's champnio (sic) came on first, a very nice lady, but sadly for me she sounded like a genius and rattled through her questions very quickly. I have to say I feared the worst. And then it was my turn. I answered as many as I could and finally got one wrong after the "one wrong and you're out" sound and felt I hadn't quite done enough. After another lengthy wait the results were announced... I had won - by one point. What a relief! I couldn't believe it. I won all the prizes this fine lady had accumulated last week and I have to say I felt a bit guilty. Then Steve Wright's assistant, the glamorous Tim Smith, told me what my personal prize was - namely a years supply of Broccoli! Much guffawing from my wife and the people in the studio. However she was a bit more impressed when it was announced I had won a top of the range cast iron wok to cook it all in! Finally they asked me if I would like to come back tomorrow. I said yes! So please tune in again tomorrow to BBC Radio 2, 88 to 91FM, at about a quarter to four and cheer on your favourite Tudor monarch for another attempt to win more prizes from Steve Wright...

Wish Me Luck...

Hello Henry fans! Wish me luck... This coming Monday afternoon I will be appearing on the BBC Radio 2 show "Steve Wright in the Afternoon" taking part in their "The Big Quiz" section. It will be on about a quarter to four in the afternoon and it is my chance to show off my general knowledge, or possibly lack of it!

I might even get a chance to plug this website! Tune in between 88 and 91FM to BBC Radio 2 on Monday 16th April next week.

Barrington Court - Part III

Today is my Father's 70th birthday, but today was also my final appearance of the weekend at Barrington Court. The previous two days had been bathed in beautiful bright warming sunlight, but today dawned a little over cast with the occasional break in the clouds. Yesterday's "Carry on Henry" was replaced with a slightly quieter day today. There was still plenty of people about, but not the rush of Sunday.

It was an extra pleasure for me today as Amanda and James were coming over to see me in action as the King. The only problem with this is that occasionally I would be embroiled in talking to someone as Henry, when James would suddenly appear between us and shout "Hello Daddy! I love you!" and would then run off. Quite difficult to keep up the facade of being Henry VIIIth when that happens. It was another good day and it was nice to meet Amanda and James, and our friend Alison Barling and her children and parents, for a nice relaxing non-alcoholic drink at the Beagles Cafe after I had finished being the King.

Back home for a relaxing evening and a good chortle at watching "Most Haunted".

Barrington Court - Part II

A long Easter Sunday for me. This began with the shock of my alarm going off at 6am so that I could make my way down to Ilchester. I was down that neck of the woods for the car boot sale at the playing fields there. I had a pretty good day and certainly didn't freeze as I did last week!

I got home for a brief lunch with Amanda and James before making my over to Barrington Court for my second appearance of three. I stopped in at the petrol station at Merriott, but as seems the norm these days, they had no fuel again!

Barrington was packed to the rafters, with cars spilling out of both car parks and staff having trouble finding space for the new visitors. I got changed in Matthew Applegate's office and launched out into the bright sunlight to meet the visitors. It was a lovely fun day again, lots of really cute kids dying to meet the King and ask questions, and some great "grown ups" most of whom also had good questions. One lady in particular from the village of Barrington did a fine line in doubles entendres! After she described herself as a simple wench, I made the joke of getting her into the dilapidated stables at Barrington. She complained that "they're coming down already!" before squealing "the stables! I meant the stables!" After that hilarity had died down I had a wander further afield, only to bump into this fine lady again as she came out of the National Trust shop. I had earlier mentioned my Henry work taking me far afield. As soon as she spied me this time she came up to me and asked: "How far do you go?" This naturally prompted me to crack up laughing and her to say again "What have I said?" And so the day went on!

Back there again tomorrow for the final time this Easter. I hope it is as good as today.

First Day at Barrington...

Today had a less than auspicious start. Instead of having a nice pleasant morning pottering around a local garden centre (original plan for this Easter Weekend), we discovered that my wife's car had a bald tyre. Upon taking it to Bathwick Tyres in Yeovil we discovered it needed FOUR new tyres. It turned out it would have been cheaper to have taken my wife to the garden centre after all!

After a quick lunch I was about to leave for Barrington Court for my 2pm to 4pm stint when I suddenly realised I hadn't had a shave for a couple of days and Henry looked decidedly fuzzy. I hammered through a quick shave which led to the inevitable screaming, blood and pieces of toilet paper stuck to my face and neck. I must have looked a less than Right Royal sight when I arrived!

The weather was fantastic and the turn out remarkable. Both car parks were full to bursting point. I strolled around the gardens in my full gear chatting to various visitors and posing for photos. It was all good fun. Then a lovely surprise! My cousins Anne and Jack from Portesham in Dorset arrived with their son Peter, his lovely wife Sue and their children (and I hope I get all these names right!) Sam, Jenny, Amelia and Anna! It was delightful to see them all. Sadly, at the end of the day I missed meeting them for a quick cup of tea as they went to the posh restaurant at Barrington and I (being me!) headed for the equally nice but more relaxed atmosphere of Beagles Cafe. Never mind. I chatted to them on the phone this evening and explained my silliness. It is back to Barrington tomorrow for more of the same, and the weather forecast is good for the next two days. This is one happy King!

Barrington Court!

Hello folks! Just to remind you this is your chance to meet the King face to face. On April 7th, 8th and 9th I shall be making appearances at Barrington Court from 2pm to 4pm each day, wandering round the delightful grounds, chatting to whoever wants to ask the King a question and leaping out of bushes startling small children (not very often I hasten to add). Bring along your cameras for a real chance to quiz a real life Tudor monarch.

Cotford St Luke School

What a good day this has been! If I can find a better school, more friendly group of teachers, or sparkier kids than this lot in the next 12 months, I reckon I will be doing pretty well!

I set out this morning for my trek to Cotford St Luke with some slight reservations, mostly about the journey. I would have to travel right through the middle of Taunton, a well known bottle-neck. I have been caught out by Taunton before, most notably on my most recent visit to Dunster School. Luckily today it was mostly benign and I made steady if unspectacular progress.

Cotford St Luke appears to be being completely rebuilt. There are new areas of it apparently springing up everywhere. The school appears to be brand new, as though the wrappers have only just been torn off it. It nestles next to the semi-renovated remains of an old Victorian asylum that broods over the whole area. I was warmly welcomed by an old friend, Adrian Jones, who I had previously met when I visited him at his old school of St Mary's in Bridgwater nearly two years ago. I piled all my stuff into the main hall and got into costume. The morning was fine, with some good knowledge from the children and laughs aplenty. At lunch time I was treated to an Ocean Pizza, which lived up to it's name by being not so much fishy as FISHY!!!! in the extreme.

The afternoon seemed to go even better. Laughs galore during the stocks, which poor old Mr Jones got stuck in (which I believe he suffered the indignity of at St Mary's!) before the jousting started. At lunch time, I had said to Mrs Cooper (another one of the teachers at the school and a very glamorous lady! I hope she is blushing when she hears about this!) that I was absolutely certain that the ladies would win the jousting. It is a good job I am not a betting man. The boys won, only just, but they did. The first time in a long time.

My drive home was interrupted by a crashed tractor near Kingstone just outside Ilminster, but I got home in one piece. I am due back at Cotford St Luke in July - I can't wait! Thank you for a wonderful day, I really enjoyed it! Superb school!

Chard School

Spring has arrived it seems! Brilliant sunshine today and a nice short round trip for me, to Fore Street in Chard and a visit to the historic Chard School. The main part of this lovely school dates from the 1580's, but I am performing in the old Chapel which is even older. No one is quite sure of the exact date but it could be contemporary with Henry VIIIth himself!

The caretaker is the first person to greet me and gives me a full run down on the previous evening's "X-Factor" talent show the children had put on. Then the headmaster comes to join me. He is very warm and welcoming and bears a more than uncanny resemblance to the character Scottie as he appeared in the later Star Trek films.

The children, as with most private schools, are very confident and knowledgable. Thankfully they laugh at all the gags as well. The day is given a slightly disjointed edge by not having one teacher with the group all day. Instead, each teacher who's lesson I am interrupting, sits in for that hour or so. However, the day goes swimmingly. I am treated to a lovely lunch by the headmaster's charming wife in their flat overlooking Fore Street, before I am back on parade in the chapel for the stocks session and a final jousting tournament. Very predictably the ladies win the jousting! Big rousing cheers at the end and then I am on my way. A lovely day and a lovely school.

Thursday I am off for the first of two days at Cotford St Luke (the 2nd day isn't until July!).

Drayton Middle School, Norfolk

Now before I start today's blog, a little comment on yesterday's entry. Moonroot, in the comments section asked whether the child lying at my feet had been rendered unconscious by my musical ability. I don't think he had. As it is my son, James, who is lying there, and as his grandparents were with him, I am thinking it was probably a case of him being told he would have to go home and leave Daddy dressed as "The King" and he was protesting. Naturally, whenever I wish to render my son unconscious I always use a coal shovel like every sensible parent should. But seriously...

I had a far better nights sleep last night and woke up at the usual ungodly hour to drive to Norfolk feeling a bit more with it than yesterday. It was still bitterly cold as I stepped outside and it took a while to defrost the screen of the car entirely. However, I made very good progress again and was soon driving through beautiful frosty countryside up the A12. The sky was delightful, ice cream pinks mixing with swooping blues, and all flecked here and there with wispy cirrus clouds.

Drayton is a small village/town on the northern outskirts of Norwich and a place I had never visited before, but it seems quite charming! The school was nice and easy to find and I was soon being welcomed in with a hot cup of tea and a whistle-stop tour of the school facilities. Mr Wilkinson, my main contact for the year 5's I was with today, looked fabulous dressed in his green Tudor gear and went up in my estimation immensely when he revealed that he was a Manchester City fan like me! It was another biggish group today and my voice was suffering a little from three shows in four days, but it held out remarkably well. I got two breaks in the morning as there was morning assmbly to get through and then a usual morning break. Lunch was very nice, roast beef, Yorkshire puds, roast spuds and peas with a thick gravy and a nice crisp juicy apple for afters. All of the teachers had dressed in splendid Tudor clothing and the ladies in particular looked absolutely lovely! All but one of the children had come in fabulous costumes as well and it all just added to the good feeling about the day. The final joust was again a good one, but this time the gents bucked the trend and triumphed by a couple of quoits.

Fond farewells are said and I drive back to my parents in Essex. I shall be having dinner soon and will stay the night here tonight and have a nice leisurely drive back to Somerset and my loving wife and son tomorrow. All in all, a superb school and a good day.

Falcon Middle School, Sprowston

After a particularly appalling nights sleep, I got up at a very early hour and prepared for the long hike from Essex up to Norfolk for today's Henry visit. I had driven up from Somerset to my parent's house in Mountnessing the day before. On stepping out of the front door at about 5.30 am I was presented by piercingly cold clear morning. My car had a light dusting of snow across it and the morning sky was flecked with scudding clouds.

Soon I was on my way, up the jolly A12 (a road I am now far more familiar with now that I no longer live in Essex) and made very good headway. The faintly ridiculous Sarah Kennedy was waffling on the radio about how grateful she was that the wind had dropped. She clearly wasn't standing on the forecourt of the petrol station on the A12 where I was. I have no idea where the wind was coming from (Antarctica at a guess) but I knew where it was going. It was howling round me!

I soon found myself in Norwich, a delightful city, a winding my way past Carrow Road (home of Norwich City FC) and on the road up to Sprowston itself. This was a completely new school for me, but it was truly wonderful. A fabulously warm welcome from everyone and I was even allowed to park in the disabled parking bay when there was no space left in the car park - though I did make it clear that I would be happy to move if necessary. There was about 70 children today and despite being very quiet at the start they soon warmed up as the day got going. Lunch was very nice, a warming sausage pie with thick gravy, followed by Bakewell tart with custard!

The afternoon sped by and the jousting was just wonderful. In the grand final the gents got way out in front, but the ladies pegged them back and finally snatched victory with a quite magnificent anchor leg from their last lady. Lots of laughs and thank yous and a promise of a return visit next year. Sounds good to me.

The drive back to my parents was relatively easy and I am now about to have a small drink with my father and then allow my mother to molly coddle me with a proper home dinner. Very nice! Tomorrow its back to Norfolk and Drayton Middle School.

St Martin's Junior School, Weston-super-Mare

Today was a good example of one thing leading to another. I got today's appearance at St Martin's Junior in Weston-super-Mare after my show at the North Somerset Museum back in February. One of the children at the school had seen me, handed one of my leaflets in at the school and here I was almost exactly a month later making this appearance!

It was a really good day today. Nearly 200 children is always going to be challenging, but these kids were brilliant! Full of beans, ready to laugh, ready to enjoy and they also knew when to sit and listen. The morning was partially interrupted by an assembly where the Welsh head teacher wanted to make a few choice comments about the Rugby match between Wales and England this weekend! He seemed very happy indeed...

The morning was good, considering how big some of the groups were with the activity rotation, but this afternoon almost topped the lot! The noise during the final of the jousting was almost unbelievable! They fair blew the roof off the place! In a pulsating finale it was the ladies who just sneaked home (as usual) and took the plaudits. As for me, I packed up and headed home to my lovely wife, my darling little boy and a plate of spaghetti bolognese. You can't ask for much more than that from life.

St Martin's Junior was a delightful school and I would love to visit them again some time. Next Henry? Wednesday at Falcon Middle School in Sprouston near Norwich. See you then.

King Henry VIIIth Launched into My Space!

Just a quick note to let you all know that in a desperate attempt to remain trendy, groovy and, above all else, not 40 years old, I have been persuaded to launch my own My Space site. At the moment this is still very much in it's infancy, but it will be a nice compliment to the official website (www.goodkinghal.co.uk) and to this Blog.

You can visit my "My Space" site, which will give you all the latest news about what Henry is up to and where you can come and see me in action as everyone's favourite despotic Tudor monarch at http://www.myspace.com/henryviiith There will also be lots of Henry photos put on here and you never know, maybe even some sound bites and even video clips to entertain. Fingers crossed! Keep watching for more...

Oakfield, Dartford & Sweyne, Swanscombe

Another two days in Kent. Just think, if I stay for a few more days I could probably apply for citizenship! Monday and Tuesday this week were third year in a row visits to two of my favourite schools in Kent. On Monday I was due at Oakfield Junior School in Dartford. I had driven to Kent on the Sunday afternoon and stayed at my sister's house again near Sittingbourne. We enjoyed Sunday night with an Indian takeaway and some silly TV.

I got up relatively early on the Monday and made my way to Dartford. Oakfield is lovely and easy to find and as ever, the friendly welcome from all the old familiar faces was very nice. The hall where I perform had been recently decorated and looked particularly spik and span! It was a great group of children as usual, if a little quieter than in recent years. One of the lads was blind and it was fun to hand him the props and let him feel them out for himself rather than have me describe them to him. The jousting was a belter as ever and went to a close finish with the ladies triumphing - as per usual. I packed up my stuff and headed back to my sister's house for a bottle of Valpolicella and a nice pasta bolognese!

Tuesday saw me hurtling back up the M2/A2 and this time to Swanscombe, sometime described as the latin quarter of Gravesend. This was my third year in a row visit to the Sweyne Junior School and yet another encounter with Mr Dan Burghin. He was as welcoming and courteous as ever and it was lovely to be back in a school that I know and enjoy so well. The children were lively and full of laughter. They had only just started studying the Tudors but still seemed to have a good grounding of general Tudor knowledge. One lad during the talk about the stocks suggested that hammers should be thrown at people in them. When I asked the group why throwing hammers at people would be a stupid thing to do, I expected the answer "it would kill you", but instead from another lad I got the suggestion that the Tudor's hadn't discovered hammers! So THAT's why all those old Tudor buildings kept falling down! All the builders were left standing around wondering what the hell they were going to use to hit the nails in with... The finale of the jousting was very very close, but this time, just for a change, the lads won. Congratulations to them.

I packed everything away and was on my weary way back to Somerset at about 3.15pm. After a nice easy journey back I found myself back home with my beloveds by about 6pm. Lovely. And now for a quiet pint with Mr Matthew Applegate at the Dinnington Docks.

The Western Gazette - FAME!

I got a phone call yesterday from a nice young reporter on the Western Gazette, asking me if I would be interested in being interviewed for inclusion in next weeks issue, particularly the Crewkerne and Villages area. Who was I to say no?

Each week they do a feature on someone from the Crewkerne area and interview them and shed a bit more light on what it is they do. So this morning (Friday) I found myself driving up to Yeovil to meet Chris Sweet of the Western Gazette at their office for an interview. Chris' shorthand skills are very good which is lucky because I waffled on so much, but he seemed very pleased with the interview and it will be featured in the next issue - out next Thursday. To finish off I was introduced to Gemma Hampson, a lovely lady who works at the Gazette and who I have dealt with in the past over Henry VIII articles and who has always been a good help. I have only ever spoken to her on the phone before, so it was nice to put a face to the voice.

This weekend will see me driving to Kent on Sunday ready for appearances at Dartford on Monday and Swanscombe on the Tuesday. Such are the demands on a Tudor Monarch...

Thomas Johnson Lower School, Lidlington

And here I was thinking D-Day was the longest day? It all began at about 3.55am when my alarm went off. There is definitely going to be a law about times like that... I got up and got ready for the rigours of the day ahead. It was going to be a long drive, all the way up to Lidlington near Bedford and Milton Keynes, and then just for the fun of it, driving back again.

My early morning driving fun was not helped by the fact that the best DJ on in the wee small hours, namely Alex Lester on Radio 2, was off and there was some bloke on instead, whose name escapes me, but he brought a whole new meaning to the word "dreadful". His phone in quiz was embarrassing, he kept fluffing words, not understanding what some people who were phoning in were saying and just generally being a bit too "Smashy and Nicey" for his own good.

One part of my journey that was nice was to see the full moon, or at least it looked full, bobbing along just above the horizon for most of the way, before broiling down in the clouds as the sun came out. Very nice!

I found the school nice and easily, but was a little bit early (it was still only about 7.45am when I got there). So I nipped off for a sandwich and a newspaper, sat and read for a bit and then made my way back to the school. I was very warmly welcomed and offered a smashing cup of tea as I set everything up. It was a small group today, about 23 children and a mixture of years 3 and 4. But we had a wonderful day. Their knowledge of the Tudors was impeccable, up until the end of Jane Seymour - but apparently that is as far as they have got in classes, so that was understandable! After a lovely lunch of Shepherds Pie it was back in the hall with all the usual afternoon shenanigans. The jousting was a blast, with the ladies quietly strolling to a comfortable triumph.

After lots of lovely help stowing stuff in the car, I was on my way and managed to get home by about 6pm, which was pretty good going, considering the weather was closing in and a large part of my journey was during rush hour. I was greeted at home by a lovely hug from James and my wife, plus she had made me for dinner... you guessed it, Shepherds Pie!

Barrington Court Re-visited

Saturday morning I paid a visit to Barrington Court near Ilminster to see Matthew Applegate, sometime visitor's services manager for the Court and occasional "God" of the acting profession. We were to discuss possible future Henry appearances at this lovely National Trust property. (For a good look at this wonderful old building and all it's opening times and info please click on this: http://www.nationaltrust.org.uk/main/w-vh/w-visits/w-findaplace/w-barringtoncourt/ .

We decided that Henry should be making appearances over the Easter weekend of the 7th, 8th and 9th April, afternoon strolls around the gardens. Then again Henry will return over the weekend of the 18th and 19th August for slightly longer Tudor musings and wanders. I love Barrington Court, it is a real gem of a place to visit and well worth making the effort.

St Michael's Junior, Colehill, Wimborne

It was another return visit for me today, for a third year running, down to Wimborne and the village of Colehill. I was back at one of my all time favourite schools – St Michael’s. This school is just so good! I always get a big group of children (usually about 130), nearly every single one of them dresses up in wonderful Tudor costumes, they always behave impeccably, they are very articulate, have good knowledge and enjoy a good laugh at most of my nonsense! The food at lunchtime is always absolutely spot on and delicious. Added to which the teachers and class room assistants are all wonderful and friendly, and the icing on the cake is that one of them is the dead ringer for Sophie Raworth! All good news from my point of view!
We had another excellent day, only broken up slightly by an enforced break as they held a morning assembly, but this just meant I got to have a much longer morning break time than usual and a couple of cups of tea! The coat of arms task instead of the Breughel painting is proving to be very popular with the children and some of their designs again today were marvellous. The afternoon session got off to a bad start as one poor little soul got upset during the crime and punishment section and was reduced to tears. I have been advised to tone it down for my return visit next year. The jousting though was of a very high standard and an incredibly noisy and tumultuous final saw the ladies just snatch victory away from the gents. Wonderful stuff.
My drive home was nice and uneventful and my lovely wife then bought home a take away curry. Now that is what I call a good Friday.
Next week I am off to Thomas Johnson School in Lidlington in Bedfordshire.

Coalway Junior, Coleford

Today was my third visit in three years to one of the loveliest schools you could ever wish to find! I was back up at Coalway Junior in Coleford in Gloucestershire. It is a pleasant, if somewhat long drive up to the place, being only just short of 100 miles and taking in crossing the Severn Bridge and going up through Chepstow, but some of the views when driving up into rural Gloucestershire are just delightful - or I should say they usually are, this morning was somewhat fog enshrouded. It was nice to get to the school again. Yet again I had the two classes of year fives who were really sparky and great fun. They really got into the making of their own coats of arms and also showed a fine and deep knowledge of the whole Tudor family.

After lunch the gruesome Tudor punishments were greeted with the usual mixtures of "Ewwwwwww!" and laughter! The jousting was just magnificent with the grand final between the ladies and the gents going right down to the wire, with the ladies coming from behind to pip the lads as they struggled with their last quoit. Marvellous stuff.

The drive home was relatively easy and I have this evening been sifting through loads of great photos sent to me of the party last weekend. These are great mementoes of a wonderful night. Everyone who came seemed to enjoy themselves and I have been requested to organise another party next year! I shall see...

Next Henry... St Michael's Junior, Wimborne on Friday.

A Grand Tudor 40th Birthday Bash

The Date? Saturday 24th February 2007. The place? Clapton Village Hall, near Crewkerne, Somerset. The event? My 40th birthday party! I have to just quickly say I had a wonderful evening, and I like to think that my friends did as well. We had about 70+ people turn up for the event, many of them dear old friends who I hadn't seen in years and who had travelled many miles to be there. I was very moved.

We had fine Tudor food (as you can see in the picture) supplied by my friends Tris and Jane Pinkney from the very wonderful Bilby's Cafe which you can find in Ilminster, and also in Chard and Crewkerne. The music was superb coming from the lively folk duo of Morgan Rattler, again highly recommended and really got the evening going beautfiully. And finally there was the World premiere of a new radio play entitled "Henry VIII - A Life" written by yours truly and acted out by a superb cast, some of whom had only known they were going to be in it by a matter of hours. Top honours must go to Matthew Applegate of Barrington Court who ended up copping the part of Sir Thomas Cranmer after my old friend Simon Whittaker from Alsager was unable to attend at the last minute. The rest of the cast were: Me as Henry, Ted Heath as Will Somers, Simon Runagall as Sir Thomas Cromwell, Cathy Martin as Lady Cilla of Ye Black, Ann Turner-Maynard as both Lady Legovia-Crumpet and Princess Voluptua, Alison Barling as Catherine Howard and my lovely wife Amanda as Catherine Parr. Viv Rich jumped in at the last minute as our narrator. Viv's husband John videoed the entire play and has threatened me with a DVD of it.

It was nice to see some representatives of some of the local schools, including Tracy and Sally from Arbishop Cranmer School in Taunton and Alexine and friends from Brookside School in Street.

All in all a very memorable weekend (which had kicked off with a splendid evening meal and drinks over at the Dinnington Docks) which I am still trying to recover from!

Today is my actual birthday, so I am taking it easy with James at home and will be taking him out for a little trip shortly. Tomorrow it is back to being Henry again with a visit to Coalway Junior School in Coleford, Gloucestershire.

North Somerset Museum, Weston-super-Mare

As it is half term, Henry's like me get the chance to do visits that aren't the usual school days. Today was one of those days and also included me going to Weston-super-Mare for the first time in my life. All I really knew of Weston was that (a) it was by the sea, and (b) it is the birthplace of John Cleese.

Luckily the museum was very easy to find (if you have a sat nav) and I could unload parked just outside it. I was welcomed by all the staff, who were without fail, warm, cheerful and very friendly. After dumping all the stuff from the "Henry-mobile" (for this, read "Elderly Green Honda Accord"), I had to then go and park it in a nearby car park.. Obviously the word "nearby" has a completely different meaning in Weston-super-Mare. This place was about a mile away, three times the size of a football pitch and with only one working ticket machine for the pay and display, which just happened to be about 500 yards from where I parked. My, how we laughed.

I trekked back to the Museum and got changed into my glad rags. It was a lovely day! Lots of people coming and going, lots of lovely friendly children, some really cute little ones and some happy jolly parents and grandparents. I wandered about a little, tootled on my instruments and chatted to anyone who came within earshot of me. The "So Solid Crew" from Bristol were a bit much to take, but I had a good laugh with and at them from time to time.

Had some lovely photos taken by lots of different people, and posed right at the end with an almost too cute little lady called Isis and her stunning Mother! All that was needed then was to put everything away, have a quick "Great March" over to get the car back from the back of beyond, drive back to the Museum, throw everything in the car and then head for home. And here I am! It was a lovely day today, thoroughly enjoyable at a wonderful Museum. Go and visit it if you are in Weston - you won't be disappointed!

Westonzoyland Junior

What a lovely day! No, not the weather, which is unlike the rest of Britain at the moment. The rest of Britain is currently doing a very passable impression of Antarctica, here in deepest rural Somerset it is wet with a capital splosh. It has poured down all day from a leaden sky that seemed to get lower by the minute.

I drove out to the school at Westonzoyland through enormous puddles and with the cricket on the radio. We skittled the Aussies for 252, but as I tuned in we were reduced to 14-3. I gave up at this point as I had arrived at the school. I received a lovely warm welcome from all the teachers and my fears were calmed somewhat as I was under the impression I was with just years 2 and 3 for the day, who might be a little young to get all the jokes and references. I had no such worries. I was in with everyone from year 2 to year 6, and the little ones got it just as much as the older ones! We had a wonderful day. So many laughs from such a wonderful group of children. They really knew their Tudor stuff as well. We over ran slightly on each session, just purely as the children were enjoying themselves so much and laughing.

At lunch time I was presented with some fan mail from some of the children, which was very sweet, and I was inundated with more later! I shall see if I can put some of them on the wesbite in the next few days.

The afternoon was quite riotous with so much fun and laughter that I had to quieten it down a bit at times! The jousting was of a prodigiously high standard, with the boys winning AGAIN! I left with the endorsement of some of the children still ringing in my ears - they said: "you are the best visitor we have ever had at this school!" I was deeply touched. It is nice to know that your work is appreciated.

When I left this morning, I left a note on the front door in case someone might actually come and deliver my piano at last. When I got back the note had been updated to say that a delivery had been made and was with my next door neighbour, Geoff. I went over to Geoff and he proudly told me he had a parcel for me. I was very excited. Until he produced a big box of Lush bath products for my wife which had been sent to her as a birthday present from my sister. DOH! So, still no piano.

Finally, England have thrashed the Aussies with Paul Collingwood playing a heroes innings. I should have listened longer, shouldn't I?

St Margaret's Junior School, Tintinhull

I am still getting over a very traumatic day yesterday. First of all I was to sit at home and wait for the delivery of my 40th birthday present from everyone, namely a brand new digital piano! So, I began waiting at about 8.30am. And I carried on waiting. I waited sitting down, and I waited standing up, which is pretty much the same only taller. I carried on waiting. I was soon up to Olympic Standard waiting and still I waited some more. After numerous more waits, it became apparent that the piano wasn't turning up. I had wasted a complete day when I had so much I needed to do. I had to get to the bank, post office and over to Ilminster to see Tris, and I got to do none of it. Nothing. In the evening I sat and watched England against Spain from Old Trafford. We were pants. And we lost. Then just when I thought a Wednesday evening could get no worse, my wife came downstairs to let me know she had broken this computer when she plugged her I-Pod into it. Great. After several muttered oaths and use of colourful language, I went to bed.

Today I was over at St Margaret's Junior School at Tintinhull near Yeovil, the very village that Paddy Ashdown lives in. Or did, anyway. I had to give these poor people a hand written invoice for the day, which was mightily embarrassing. However, the day (only a half day I hasten to add) was a stonker. Great kids, very lively, only about 20 of them and some really enthusiastic and friendly teachers. We had a great morning. The boys again won the jousting so this is turning into something of a habit for them. After stopping off at Crewkerne on the way home, my wife informed me that the PC was being repaired at a cost of about £90 which wasn't too bad, my piano STILL hadn't turned up, my wife's Tudor costume for my 40th HAD turned up and everything seemed to be returning to normal. As you can see, the PC is fine and dandy (I am typing this blog on the very machine I believed to be dead) and fingers crossed, it has many years of appalling blogs to be typed on it from now on!

Tomorrow, I am up bright and early and off to Westonzoyland near Bridgwater for more Tudor frolics!

Riverview Junior School, Gravesend

This was the day that might have been! I was due to appear at Riverview Junior School in Gravesend, Kent alongside a BBC film crew for an upcoming BBC3 documentary about people with red hair and how it has affected their working lives. I, of course, could not be the Henry VIII I am without having my red hair (unlike some Henry's I have seen around the country!), and the Beeb were very keen to get me on board and have me filmed "in action" at a school. I had mentioned that I was appearing at Riverview School, which being in Kent was a lot closer than Somerset and some of my other haunts. Obviously the BBC are a little like Giles Coren and are not that keen to venture too far away from their west London stamping grounds. Anyway, it was arranged with the BBC and the school for the filming to go ahead. However, on Sunday I got a call from the producer saying that Riverview School had pulled out of the day. When I asked why she said it was because they had discovered the title of the programme - and when I found out I could hardly blame them! The BBC, in their infinite wisdom, had decided to call this programme: "F-Off, I'm Ginger". Now you can see why the school said no!

Anyway, I drove up to Kent on Monday to stay at my sister's house. We had a nice evening as her husband and I both fell asleep in front of the TV after dinner and snored all through "Trial and Retribution", much to my sister's annoyance. Up early this morning and off to Gravesend. Even if the BBC weren't going to be there, I was determined to make it a good day. The teachers were lovely and friendly as ever, the children were great for such a big group (120+) and the school dinner quite spectacularly good! What more could a King ask for? The gentlemen won the jousting session at the end of the day and all the children posed for some great photos in their fabulous Tudor costumes. A visit to Riverview Junior is always a pleasure and I was not disappointed this time. Here's to next year.

I am next on parade on Thursday when I am on a half day at St Margaret's School in Tintinhull, near Yeovil.

Shepton Beauchamp School

I was a very lucky King today as I was to visit one of my favourite villages and schools in the whole UK. Admittedly, I am a little biased as I used to live there, but I am always afforded such a warm friendly welcome that I will continue to sing their praises for evermore! I am talking about Shepton Beauchamp of course, a charming little village sort of midway between South Petherton and Ilminster. My wife and I lived in Shepton between 1998 and 2004 and only the desire for a bigger house for our new enlarged family forced us to look elsewhere. I had first appeared at the school as Henry back in 2005 and had also popped back when I was asked to appear at a school for an ITV News item for the local network and Shepton kindly offered to be the school for that item.

I arrived today quite late, about 9.15am which is normally the time I begin with a group, but I knew the chidlren wouldn't be there as they were over at the village church first thing. I set up my stuff in the front class room and got changed. The children were waiting when I came out. None of them knew I was going to be there! Wonderful. We had a great morning with the opening talk going very well and a lot of the children displaying wonderful knowledge of the Tudor era. We then went straight into the coat of arms design bit which again showed some real talent from some of the children. After lunch we moved to a larger classroom where the stocks proved as popular as ever and the rip roaring jousting tournament was won by the gentlemen - by a whisker! Normally if we have some spare time I'll let the teachers have a race, but there was only Mrs Fraser in with me today, so for the teachers race and for the first time ever, I took part with a team I selected. Not wishing to show off, but I won! I suppose they felt they had to let me win as I was the King. It would have been rude not to.

I now have a nice weekend at ease followed by a trip to Kent on Monday for my appearance at Riverview School in Gravesend. The BBC will be there to film this for a BBC3 documentary about red-headed people. I wonder who they mean?

White Woman Lane and Caister School

This was another week away for me with a visit up to Norfolk and two days, one at White Woman Lane School near Norwich and another which was a return visit to Caister Middle School. However, our story begins in dark Somerset...

My car had gone in for it's MOT on Friday 26th January at Popular Motors in Merriott. I seem to spend a lot of time there, and I told Ian Summers who works there that there should be a blue plaque on the wall announcing that it was in this very car repair shop that Mike Farley's bank account died. Anyway, they got my Honda on the Friday but they needed a few spare parts which would not be available until the Monday, which was the day I was hoping to drive to Essex to see my folks before striking out for Norfolk. Sadly the delivery time of the parts was not to be until 2pm on the Monday, so that was lunch in Essex out the window! When the parts were delivered, they were the wrong parts. The proper ones didn't turn up until nearer 5pm and my car wasn't ready until just after 7pm! And then I had to drive to Essex. So though I was due to have lunch with my parents I even managed to miss dinner! Thankfully Amanda and James were there as well, so it was nice to meet and have some cuddles.

I was up at the crack of dawn to head up to Norfolk and my appointment at White Woman Lane school. This was a lovely school. White Woman Lane apparently is so named because of a ghost frequently seen in the area. Get "Most Haunted" up there, that's what I say! The children and teachers at the school were wonderful and we had a really nice day. Lots of laughs and the children had a great time doing the quiz and the design your own coat of arms. The afternoon session was super fun and the jousting a real rip snorter with the ladies triumphing as well. I then had to make a presentation to one of the little girls who was leaving the school on Friday as her family were moving out of the area.

The next day, I found myself back on the road up to Norfolk to visit Caister on Sea Middle School. This was a return visit and I picked the perfect day for it as it was the Head Teacher's 60th birthday and they had laid on drinks and a nice buffet lunch for us all. It was a big group, about 120 children, but it all seemed to go really well. They did a fine example of some Tudor dancing for me, which was much appreciated. During one of my talks in the morning I managed to get a tickle in my throat which I could not get rid of, and spent some time just coughing pathetically in front of the children, which was a bit embarrassing. Also during this point I was giving the children a little talk about writing implements used and I showed them my feather pen and asked them what it was called - the answer I got? A quiff! Perfect... The final jousting session was longer than normal because of the large number of children, but we managed to whittle all the teams down to a ladies champions and a gents, and in the final the men triumphed for once. With some help from some little roadies I was soon on my way.

I had a lovely evening with my parents and my wife, and today I have driven back to Somerset. My mother and father, gawd bless 'em, have bought me the piano I want for my 40th! It should be arriving on Wednesday next week. I can't wait!

Before then, my next Henry jobs are tomorrow at Shepton Beauchamp school and then next Tuesday with the BBC film crew at Riverview School in Gravesend.

Trull-y, madly, deeply...

It was another return visit today, almost a year on from the day I last visited Trull Primary School. From reading my old blog entry from a year ago, it seems we had the same weather today as we did then - bright and sunny, but piercingly cold.

I was warmly greeted as ever and the morning cup of tea was extremely welcome on this cold start. I was back in the main hall at Trull, which is a little like North Petherton in that it retains some elements of it's Victorian original school, but all is gleaming, brand new and bang up to date inside. I set up my stuff in the main hall and then was shown to my luxury dressing room - namely the school library. I don't think I have ever had such a large room all to myself for getting changed in. A complete opposite to the tiny toilet cubicle I had to try and use when I did the Education Exhibition up at the NEC. Also in the library was a Yamaha Clavinova electric piano and something I would very much like someone to buy for me for my birthday! Added to which it was switched on! I had a little tinkle on the ivories and it was lovely... As my son James would say, "I NEEED IT!"

The day itself was a belter, probably the best I have done this January so far. Lots of laughs and some good questions from the children. All of the costumes were fabulous, with even the teachers and TA's looking most impressive. The jousting was a really good session and the young ladies once more triumphed over their male counterparts. Normality, it seems, has been achieved.

I have had a letter from Leeds Castle today asking me back in October for a series of new Henry talks, and I am hopefully being filmed by the BBC in the beginning of February for a BBC3 documentary in the Spring. Watch this space for more...

Brookside School, Street

Here we have a lovely picture of "Mini Henry" who was bought for me at Christmas by my sister-in-law Maria. I think you will find that the resemblance is quite uncanny. Who of though, I am not quite sure...

This bright crisp morning found me heading back to Street, near Glastonbury for a return visit, for a third year running, to Brookside School. The major change from my previous visits was that they had booked me for a full day instead of my usual half day there.

I arrived smack on time and was shown through to the hall again. As usual at this lovely school, my welcome from the staff and teachers was warm and genuine. We had a great group today, about 60 in total. I have to admit that Iwas using this school as something of a guinea pig test. For a while I have been considering dropping the Breughal painting study from my Henry days, and today seemed like an opportune time to try something different. So today, during the carousel of activities at the end of the morning, instead of having one group studying a big print of the Breughal painting, we had one group designing their own coat of arms. And it went down a storm! The children loved it! So that will go in again tomorrow for my next visit.

I had to chop and change a few other aspects of the day today. We only had the main hall for the afternoon until 2.20pm, so the afternoon session for the kids consisted of the opening talk about people being hung, drawn and quartered, and then it was straight into the Jousting tournament. It was a good tourney, with the gentlemen storming to a famous victory. However, after that it was off to another classroom for the stocks session. This still went down a storm as usual, but it meant for a slightly fragmented afternoon.

I stopped in briefly at Somerton on the way home to use the bank and then this evening my lovely wife cooked a beautiful casserole and we sat and let our brains vegetate watching Celebrity Big Brother. I think I only watched it because Cleo Rocos was on it. And in the words of Barry Norman, 'and why not?'. Tomorrow, back to Trull.

A Wassail Evening at Barrington Court

Last night (Wednesday 17th), Amanda and I were invited over to Barrington Court by Matthew Applegate, to take part in a wassail evening. This is a very old ceremony that involves blessing the apple trees and imploring them to produce another good harvest of cider apples this year. It seems steeped in Pagan traditions and is a wonderful sight to behold. Matthew wanted me to read a poem at this event, and not quite sure what to choose, I spoke to my sister Susan in Wales who is something of a clever clogs when it comes to tradition, folklore and all things vaguely Pagan related. She came up trumps and emailed me the words to a lovely old carol entitled "The Gloucestershire Wassail Carol". The words are:

Wassail! Wassail! All over the town,
Our bread it is white, our ale it is brown:
Our bowl it is made of the Maplin tree,
We all be good fellows who drink to thee.

Here’s to our horse and to his right ear,
God send our master a happy New Year.
A happy New Year as e’er he did see –
With my wassailing bowl I drink to thee.

Here’s to our mare, and to her right eye,
God send our mistress a good Christmas pie;
A good Christmas pie as e’er I did see –
With my wassailing bowl I drink to thee.

Here’s to Fillpail* and to her long tail,
God send our master us never may fail
Of a cup of good beer; I pray you draw near,
And our jolly wassail it’s then you shall hear.

Be there any maids? I suppose there be some;
Sure they will not let young men stand on the cold stone;
Sing hey O maids, come trole back the pin,
And the fairest in the house let us all in.

* Quaint name for a cow!

I "performed" this poem just after an all ladies morris dancing team from Devon had been through their paces, and I am pleased to say I got a great reception from the audience and a warm round of applause. After this we had a sing song from some chap who reckoned himself a font of all knowledge when it came to wassail traditions. I hope never to be stuck in a lift with him. This was followed by another dance from the Morris troupe and then we processed through the grounds to the oldest apple tree in the orchards. This is the first time in something like 130 years that they have produced their own cider at Barrington Court, so it was quite an auspicious occasion. They have been very lucky with help from some local farmers at Barrington, one of whom has loaned them a cider press for the next five years, his repayment simply being a gallon of cider per year and, as it was the first year, a commemorative flagon produced by the Eeles Pottery. Lovely! Sadly, Amanda and I had to slip away a little early as we had left my parents looking after our little one and he was busy screaming the house down when we left. When we got home he was still up and my parents were almost word perfect on the script of "Monsters Inc." having watched it several times over!

North Petherton Junior

It was a nice relatively local jaunt for me today, up the old M5 towards Bridgwater and then scooting off to North Petherton instead. I was due at this school about a year or so ago, but at the last minute they had to cancel me and it has taken this long for the right date to come round again. My first impressions were very good. The school has a Victorian front to it, but this is merely a facade. Almost immediately behind this all is modern and brand spanking new, and very impressive it is too! The teachers are similarly welcoming and friendly, I couldn't have asked for more hospitality.

I was introduced to Jo whose class of year 3/4's I was to be dealing with today. It was only a group of about 25 children, but they were really wonderful, even the little year 3's who had at first seemed a little overawed by Henry's presence, but soon came into their own. We had a really good morning and plenty of laughs. At lunch time I had a walk into North Petherton itself to get some lunch and was delighted to find that my old friend Belinda Stephens from Charlton Hawthorne school was working as a supply teacher at North Petherton today. Added to which another old friend from Hugh Sexey School in Wedmore has moved jobs in the summer and he was now working here as well! This was a reunion almost getting onto "This is Your Life" proportions...

The afternoon was terrific fun. The gentlemen just managed to pip the ladies to the championship on the jousting. After this, when I would normally be contemplating going home, I was asked to take the afternoon assembly for the whole school. I did this as a question and answer session and plenty of laughs were had by all. After leaving I stopped off at Ilminster to get some money and I am now looking forward to a day off tomorrow and my parents visiting on Wednesday for a few days!

Friends School, Saffron Walden

I like this picture on the left! Admittedly, it has nothing whatsoever to do with todays blog entry, but there you go. It is me, my lovely wife Amanda and young James during one of my days over at Barrington Court last summer! Thought you might enjoy it!

Anyway, on to today. I am in Essex again for my first day back as Henry after the Santa Claus escapades at Leeds Castle over the festive season. I was to drive up to Friends Junior School in Saffron Walden for a return visit, my previous appearance there being back in September 2005. I woke up early and struck out into the blowy, wet miserable morning. My sat nav took me a most amusing route via Widford, Writtle, the Easters and Great Dunmow. I only wanted a quick stop at Inverness and Cardiff and I would have had the full set. As it was, I arrived at the school promptly. Once again we were back in the Scouts Hut, which is perfectly adequate if a little creaky and old. However, with the wind howling and the trees outside shaking around I kept waiting for the whole building to take off. It was a small group today, only about 23 children, but they were very sparky. As we only had the one room to play with, the morning activities we all did together for a change, rather than with the group split up into smaller divisions. I struggled a bit today, feeling very sluggish and tired after the Christmas lay off, but the children and teachers seemed to enjoy it. The afternoon was a real struggle. However, the jousting was a success and yet again the ladies were there to triumph when it mattered. I drove back to my parents the far more sensible M11 route, but the wind is still howling like a banshee, so instead of ploughing back to Somerset tonight, I am going to lay low in Essex and hopefully scoot back tomorrow morning.

Happy New Year

Hello folks! This is a belated, but heartfelt wish of a Happy New Year to you all. I am enjoying my last few days of freedom before I have to don the tights and become Henry again.

I was on Radio 5 Live today. They were having a discussion tied in with the broadcast tonight of "This Life - 10 Years On". The question was, what were you doing 10 years ago and has your life changed much. I couldn't resist it! I phoned in and was on air before you could say "off with their heads!" I had a nice chat with Phil Williams the presenter about how I came to be Henry VIII and after about three minutes I was done. But I did give the website a plug and we have been inundated with hits on the site ever since.

I have been for a little pub visit with Matthew Applegate of Barrington Court this evening. I am appearing at his Wassail Evening on the 17th January. I ought to put it in the diary before I forget. Night night!

And now for something slightly the same.

In my previous blogs I had forgotten to thank a very special person in particular, that person was Amy who was one of three different Tinkerbells during my various days as Father Christmas at Leeds Castle.

On one of my final days I was taking photos of a lot of the different people who had helped during our time there. I took this one of Amy and she urged me never to show this picture to anyone. When I mentioned I had a website (www.goodkinghal.co.uk) she was terrified that I might publish it on there. I assured her I would never do such a thing. But I never mentioned anything about my Blog site! So here is young Amy Creasey, as I believe her full name was, in her full Fairy Glory! Thank you, Amy!

A Belated Merry Christmas from Henry the Santa...

As you can see, from this horrific image, I have been terrorising the good families of Kent in my guise as Father Christmas at Leeds Castle. It has been quite a couple of weeks...

It began with me driving down to Southampton on the 15th December to meet up with old friends from my days working at that most wonderful and cuddly of employers, Skandia Life. I had lunch with the lovely Sue Marsh at Piccolo Mondo, a wonderful little restaurant near Skandia House, and then it was a short walk to the Old Fat Cat Pub to meet up with Julie Beard and Matt Keane. After leaving Southampton I drove up the M3 to the M25 and shot over to Kent to head back to my sisters for another week and a bit being Santa at Leeds. It was a great week, but hard work. Now you wouldn't believe that sitting on your bottom and asking children if they have been good was hard work, but by God it is. After the first couple of hours your mind starts to wander and your bottom starts to feel like barnacles have been welded on to it. The rest of the people, as with everything I have done at Leeds Castle, were wonderful and it was so nice to be back amongst this group, who are now like a new family for me!

During the week I finally got to see the film "Borat". It was wonderful. I haven't laughed so much at a film for a long long time. Highly recommended. The rest of the week continued apace with some incredibly cute children coming to visit Santa. One little lad was sitting happily picking his nose while telling me what he wanted. His father said "Stop that, Jack!" Young Jack promptly removed his finger from his nose, with a nice big juicy bogey on the tip. "Oh, Jack!" admonished his father, "get rid of it!" Jack duly did, by smearing it down the arm of his father's jacket. In the words of Mastercard - priceless.

My sister Cathy and Julian had a burglary at their house in the early part of the week with Julian losing a motorbike from their front yard. He increased their security at their home with a new massive set of steel gates at the top of their drive.

I continued at Leeds Castle until Christmas Eve and thoroughly enjoyed myself. I would like to say a big thank you again to the lovely Darlene Cavill for organising the whole thing, and to her assistant Helen for frequent lifts from the Maiden's Tower back to the Estate Office. And for her wearing a silly hat. And giving my wife and I a nice box of posh biscuits for Christmas. And to Jeanne and to Barry and Carole and Ann and Ann and everyone who helped make it such a memorable experience.

Christmas Day was at my parents in Essex with my wife and son, and my sister Cathy and husband Julian. Amanda and I had a bit of a fright on Boxing Day when my left leg came up with a very sore area at the bottom of my calf. We were frightened that it might be a deep vein thrombosis brought on by too much sitting around as Father Christmas, so it was off to accident and emergency at Basildon Hospital for me. It turned out to be just a skin infection and I am now taking ibuprofen to help sort it out.

We drove back to Somerset on the afternoon of the 26th and are now safely ensconced here. Next Henry is on the 11th January at Friends School in Saffron Walden. Happy New Year!

Kingston St Mary

After a couple of days of either (a) looking after James, and/or (b) Christmas shopping, it was quite a relief to get back to being Henry again, even if it was for only half a day. But what a half day!

I had been booked to appear at Kingston St Mary school in the village of the same name that lies just to the North West of Taunton. I had been recommended to the school by one of their teaching assistants who had seen me at Taunton Castle Museum's Christmas Fayre back in November (hence my use of this picture at the top of this blog - from left to right: Superannuated Wench #1, Me, Superannuated Wench #2, Sparky the Dragon [don't ask] and a lute player. So now you know). A recommendation like this is a real God send as mostly the school knows what to expect. Anyway, after the usual awful drive through a Taunton rush hour I arrived via some back roads in the village of Kingston St Mary - and it is delightful! A little hidden gem of a village. The school itself was very easy to find and the teachers were overwhelmingly friendly and attentive. I set up and the combined years 3/4/5/6 came in for the opening talk. If I say so myself, they loved it. Plenty of laughs and some good answers from the children, particularly from one young lady called Ellie. After a quick break it was back with just years 3/4 for some Tudor crime and punishment, then we had some fun with the stocks and finished just before lunch with an excellent jousting session, which the ladies won to keep things back to how they should be!

After driving home and having lunch, Amanda, James and I headed off to Yeovil for some more Christmas shopping (will it EVER end?) and then tonight my wife and I are going to spend a passionate evening - wrapping up presents. We know how to enjoy ourselves!

Tomorrow I am driving to Southampton to meet the Skandia bunch for some lunch and drinkies, then it is on back down to Kent to Cathy and Julian's place again for another nine days at Leeds Castle as Father Christmas. I shall try and have a quick blog from time to time as my spare times allows me.